Sunday, April 14, 2019

The Truth Beneath the Skin.

With time, I am not sure whether things are being clearer or I am simply being one amongst many : judgmental. 

He who is not a socialist at the age of 19, has no heart. He who is still a socialist at 30, has no brain. 

With time, I reckon one doesn't become a cold hearted person, one just learns not to be fooled around. A decade ago, I can't speak for others, but, I, myself : had my own thoughts about world peace, about an egalitarian society. Not that I wanted to embark upon politics or wanted to change the world, I just loved being engulfed with my thoughts and ideologies, over how beautiful the whole world would be, if we all respected each other and lived in peace. With food that would be sufficient for the world that nobody died out of hunger. With no religion that divided us and enveloped us with insanity to prove others wrong or worse case scenario, to march upon for crusades. With no politics that taught us to hate each other and argue within ourselves.

With time, I think I am being more shallow, and I feel that these goals were something that ideologists of our era, the ones from the past and the ones from the future will write about: to fill in their pages of poetry, a means to amuse the minds - to nurture this very beautiful dreams of peace and hope. Everybody wants peace at their backyard, but nobody wants to actually vouch for it, at least when greed gets amalgamated with their desires and not just wishes and hopes. 

There would be times when I sympathized over the poor souls, felt sorry for the lives that they had lived and felt bad. I still do, but there is no zeal to make difference upon anymore.

It gets me pondering upon at times, whether we can really know the essential truth or do we even deserve to know the truth? Do we even have trained minds to realize what the truth is? And even if we were by chance, embraced or bestowed upon the power to know the very truth, could we really handle the truth? Will truth shatter the very feelings that we have for one another and isn't trust so rare now, or does it still rekindle amongst the young souls? Do we really need to lose our naivety to understand the pictures behind the curtains that unveils? Or is it always like this, that we have bigger expectations from the world and the world disappoints us all the time? 

Perhaps, a mind that judges is happier than the ones which don't, and perhaps, looking at a person's condition and drawing a conclusion helps and saves us our own peace of minds. Why should empathy and sympathy be given to those, for it is their lives and not ours? 

In a blink of an eye, it is said that at times, a life changes, and I am not sure whether my eyes really blinked or not, but surely, somewhere it changed everything. 

My wife told me once, that I have all the time to think about everything that's wrong with the world, without having time to think over myself - and perhaps, it is not the time that I have to think - it is the zeal that I have. And why write about it? I don't know.

And in everything that I have gone through, I have realized, that life has given me enough reasons to be sadder each day, and I have realized, counter measured so far - unknowingly - to just be content : indeed, it's not going to be happy lives for everybody all the time. Perhaps, even the main purpose isn't about being happy at all, perhaps, it's just what I said couple of times, not to be sad each day. And happiness is not easy, but life too isn't. 

And, a true virtue and integrity speaks about a man's soul: for no matter what situation he is in, he shouldn't exploit others. If you are poor, this doesn't mean that you are bound to steal. If you are sad, this doesn't mean that you inflict pain upon others. If you are wronged, this doesn't mean that you can avenge for it is not your rights to be vengeful. If you have succeeded, this doesn't mean you become jealous over someone. And even if you succeed, this doesn't mean you can belittle others who haven't. Maybe, the truth beneath the skin, is not described by mere words but by gestures and actions - for sarcasm is flow of words - how you behave with others, is something that has always won friends and trust. We just can't say that we are not good at socializing and exploit every other person that we meet in our lives. We just can't choose money over friendship, because money we can earn anytime, but trust from a person, that's priceless. 

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