Tuesday, October 11, 2011

I am very Much Tired

I am tired, I am tired of everything that is happening around. You see, I don't know at what point one feels like not to write anymore, I really don't know about that. But my time has come, and henceforth I don't want to write anymore. I don't want to write, I don't want to sketch and I really don't want to socialize. But I however will sketch for charity and even though I am always busy, I will try to manage time for that.



But I am tired as of now. Maybe, because for a decade, my writing style hasn't evolved or perhaps maybe, I am too sick of things going around. Who are your friends? Friends are those who are there for you all the time, and I pissed my true friends. I wanted to say those things to my other friends, but I landed up drunk and told it to the wrong people. I am ashamed of that. I hope things work out as smooth as before, but somewhere, I know, things won't be just the same as before.

I am tired of seeing that money matters all the time and people do anything for that. At times, I am really frustrated myself with no pocket money and no job, but I hope that sun will shine tomorrow. You see, being a middle class sucks big time, it usually sucks when you really need the money. Now money is such a sensitive topic for us Bhutanese that everybody behaves like they don't want it, but behind the backs and internally, everybody connives for it. And yet, Buddhism is all we boast about.

I am tired with the hypocrisy of society, whereby we see violence, racism, caste system, etc etc.
I am really tired of the world, I am tired of everything. I am tired of looking at people being really ass lickers and I am tired of looking at pretentious people. I am tired of looking at selfish people and I am tired of rich always having and getting things done the way they eventually want it to be. I am tired of seeing people acting so naive when all they are is bunch of racist herds. I am tired of seeing people taking pride over their ancestors' achievements and they themselves are hopeless and useless. I am tired of seeing the notions everyday, whereby, every individual thinks that what they do is cool and what others do, be it a good cause, is funny. I am tired of seeing dumb people climbing up and really smart ones being worked out. I am tired of reading that everyday some thousands are dying due to starvation. I am tired. I am tired.

I am tired of seeing the religious pricks brain washing the people, and funny thing, people also following it. I am tired of people being so harsh to one another and expect themselves going to heaven. I am tired of seeing people fighting wars, not respecting human souls because they have different notions, but again, they have this urge to save the rain forest and endangered animals. What gives them the right to take a human soul and again act kind hearted?

I am tired of seeing nepotism flush over everywhere that it is just like a sewage leakage in the middle of town. I am tired of seeing people falling in love and one moment they worshiping their partners as some sort of local deity and next moment, bitch about each other. I am tired of seeing people really care and when it comes for the real deal, their stunt for grabbing attention fades away with their true colour. I am tired of everything. And yes, you may take me as frustrated man, but when I was brought up in schools and when I lived my life, I didn't expect these things going around. And if you are fine with what is going around, I hope you get tired someday. I am tired of seeing dumb kids taking the slots of qualified students and well, what do you expect? Failing! I am tired man, I am just tired.

Maybe,  I have this high fever and feel like puking, but my illness isn't the only cause.

And eventually, I am tired of thinking about all these. As an Engineer, the moment I chose this profession, I said, screw social life. So, you see, few months from now, I will be placed in a jungle, like most of the Engineers would be, with good salary and crap. I am tired of thinking and I am tired of writing. When I will rest enough, I will come back to this blog. Till then good bye and don't get tired yourself. It surly is frustrating. 

5 comments :

  1. you are really worn out.....bro......time comes, once in a while but the time will again come once in a while to bring the energy in you to fight this tiredness and enjoy the life by making best out of whatever little it gives..

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  2. @Dawa,you seem really frustrated of the daily life. You just proved that life is not always phenomenal as most people expect as. But Dawa, you should leave for the time to heal the bad things happening around you. Wish you get the best of the best time to come around you again.
    Take Care

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  3. You shouldn't stop writing, I advise you. I too felt same way when young and inexperience like you. I used to blot out all frustrations, disappointments, anger and hopelessness to myself, to my beloved ones and of course on facebook. I used to see and feel only negatives. But I was wrong! You must always look at those places, persons, activities, feelings, past memories, nature and things that feed you positive feelings. Change your thoughts, feelings and emotions to positive. Coz your thoughts can be transformed into things. Trust me. As you're good in sketching, sketch what you want in your life (your wishes), how you want your life to be (even sketch your future wife)and keep your thoughts on it, positively. However, your action should not juxtapose your wish. I will guarantee you that you will achieve exactly what you have sketched. I believe that what you think exactly manifests in things. Try it once, and you will feel this miracle. I do it every day even my bosses scold me or even my girlfriend started seeing another man. I take everything positively and this practice changed my life completely. I must tell you that today I am never unhappy. Your thoughts of today decides your future. Try this technique, Dawa. It can change your life.

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  4. All the things that you have mentioned are real matters of concern.

    Yet we are not in control of any of those.

    All we can do is stay positive and work for the betterment, and as already stated in the comments here you may feel frustrated and tired of this world right now but the time keeps changing.

    I hope you come out of this phase soon and start living the way you want, without caring about the hypocrites, phony socialites, narrow minded religionists or any other person on this earth.

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  5. I am thr the same phase...I am frustrated..Hoping to get out of this phase soon!!! I AM TIRED!!!

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